Top 10: Corona Statements by German Politicians and their Actual Meaning

Many politicians in Germany are good people. But, no matter what side of the aisle they sit on, they do spread weird phrases at times. Did anyone say BS? No, of course not.

Let’s translate statements made by German politicians into what they actually wanted to say. Three, two, one, here we go.

10. “Masks do more damage than they help.”

Actual meaning: “I do not have the faintest clue whether wearing masks has any benefits.”

9. “Masks need to be mandatory in public transport and shops.”

Actual meaning: “Could anyone tell me whether I have to cover my nose too?”

8. “We all need to follow the Corona rules. It is imperative that we wash our hands thoroughly.”

Actual meaning: “I am your nursery school teacher. Do what I say or you won’t get vanilla sauce on top of your apple pie.”

7. “We need to find the right balance of staying safe and getting our freedom back.”

Actual meaning: “I want to be the next Chancellor.”

6. “Sneeze into the crook of your arm.”

Actual meaning: “Don’t sneeze into my face, you son of a bitch!”

5. “Wu… , wu…., wu, …. Wuhan!”

Actual meaning: “Ahhh…, ahhh…, ahhh… achoo!”

4. “We should be disciplined and not gamble away what we have achieved.”

Actual meaning: “We should be disciplined and not gamble away what we have achieved.”

3. “Because the doubt regarding the government’s measures has grown, the unanimity regarding the crisis management ends today.”

Actual meaning: “I want to be in the news too. So I decided to spread some BS at the Bundestag.”

2. “We will have to live with Corona for a long time.”

Actual meaning: “We are screwed.”

1. “We need to keep our distance out of responsibility.”

Actual meaning: “No sex until Christmas.”