The Berlin Spectator
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Berlin: Brandenburg Gate to be Turned into Giant Soccer Goal

In one and a half years, the European Soccer Championship will be hosted by Germany, but soccer fans are already excited. Germany would not be Germany if it had not planned every detail ahead of time. A new look for Brandenburg Gate is one of them.

Berlin, October 26th, 2022 (The Berlin Spectator) — In 1988, West Germany hosted the European Soccer Championship. Next time, in 2024, it will be the reunited Federal Republic of Germany. The final match and five regular ones are supposed to be played in Berlin, the city of cities, the cradle of civilization, the center of the universe.

More than Soccer

There are plans already. Sure, in each match twenty-two guys will kick the ball and each other’s shins. They will kill their own brain cells by resorting to heatbutt tactics and they will be annoyed by referee decisions when they exaggerate, by fouling their opponents. But this is about more than just soccer.

Everyone will be looking at all the activity in Berlin. A fan park as well as an extensive cultural program are being organized, including a big opening concert. Ready for another sensational highlight? Brandenburg Gate is supposed to be turned into the largest soccer goal on the planet. According to the state-owned company Kulturprojekte Berlin, which is busy organizing all kings of big events, this will be the case on June 14th, 2024. A month later, the good old Gate will be be reset to factory settings, so to speak.

Giant Football Field

The organizers say the Gate in the goal (see main photo at top of page) will be “a unique setting for unforgettable summer evenings together”. Guess what: They are probably right. What they did not say is that at least one in two soccer enthusiasts will be drunk. For the Championship, Berlin is expecting 1.5 million fans. How many bottles of beer do you think they will consume, on average?

By the way: Right in front of the Gate and the goal, Berlin will be rolling out a big lawn. That way, Strasse des 17. Juni, the big boulevard between Brandenburg Gate and the Victory Column, will become a giant football field. All of this is so exciting to die-art soccer fans. They will probably need some Valium soon.

Crammed Capital

“With Brandenburg Gate as a soccer goal, we are setting the framework for the European Championship in 2024”, the CEO of Kulturprojekte Berlin, Moritz von Dülmen, stated. Oh! So, it’s not the framework for the Moon landing of 1969? One thing is certain: Berlin will be crammed. Over and out.

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